The source of (coercive) power.


The source of (coercive) power.IMG_0811

In this article, with Power is ment coercive Power.IMG_0824

Nothing kills leadership quicker than power!!

Sometimes you recognise Power easily, if it is brutal or blunt, but mostly it is disguised as Irritation, anger or manipulation. If you want to be a spiritual leader, stay away from Power! You know for sure that how harder someone barks or yells, the more insecure he/she is.

IMG_0890To convince, does not need loudness.

It is the same with Power, the more you use Power the more fearful and uncertain you are. Fear and uncertainty in yourself leads to impotence and to disguise this you will reach to Power.

Fear/uncertainty>>Impotence>>>>Power

Impotence is a sneak killer because it always leads to Power. You can simply recognise if you are using Power because you feel yourself irritated and angry. With these feelings you are manipulating the other and you don’t allow the other to be different, not respecting his/her values.

Irritation, puts in a mental way, your foot on the chest of the other.

You can prevent this by believing in yourself. Accept yourself in your own fear and insecurity. If you can accept yourself then you also can accept others. There is no other option. Easyer said then done, you have to go looking for your strength and that means: descending to the source of your impotence ….to your fear! Learn to recognise your fear, love it and embrace it.

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Is it the fear to be rejected by the other?

Fear to be declared as fool? Fear to be denied?

Or fear to be disappointed in yourself, if something did not succeed?

You will overcome mountains of fear and you will always feel the same doubts: Can I do this?, Dare I do this? Do I ever Learn? Know that this is absolutely normal, everyone has to deal with this, but don’t go along with it!

The fear to be rejected is almost universal. No one likes to be rejected. The special thing and also the beauty of it is, that this is impossible! You can’t be rejected, at most your behaviour will! We have to understand that there is a strict separation between who we are, as human being and what we do !

Most people are still confused about the difference between are and do, and this can go back as far as their childhood! For example, did your mother say, “You are a bad boy/girl” if you did some devilment?, or did she had the wisdom to say, “I am mad about you because of what you did”?

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Our biggest fear is to be rejected!!

The parents who said, “I love you but I am really mad because of what you did”, they deserve a statue, because they knew the difference. This separation doesn’t mean that you are not responsible for your doings. You will be judged by your behaviour and this can be rejected.

Okay, you always can adapt!!

Our core as a human being is untouchable.

If you succeed to embrace your fear and don’t let it lead you, if you can separate between who you are and what you are doing, you will free the way for simplicity in yourself and for spiritual leadership towards others. Then, impotence and Power will make place for Authority!

Where Power stops and Authority begins, there begins your leadership!

From fear and uncertainty towards strength, starts with accepting what there is now! You can’t change it anymore. Next, you have to be aware that you have to go through three stages before you can return in your strength. It is not important in which order you go trough these stages, not staying in one of them, but you must experience all of them!

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1) Victim hood :  Stage of impotence.

2) Anger:  Stage of struggle with power.

3) Indifference: Stage of omnipotence, you think you can handle everything.

If you have lived in them all, experienced them all, then you will come back in your strength and the breeding ground for Power has gone. You now again can cope with the world and your environment will be guaranteed grateful to you.

Again this is leadership stuff and written for you, because you are the leader of your (working) life!

Inspired by the book “Eenvoud voor gevorderden” (Ben Meijering)